There must be a broader definition of a ‘sexual relationship’ than simply one involving genital contact. It should also be seen in a wider context than simply homosexual. We can very clearly say that people outside a marriage relationship who are involved in genital contact that is intended to arouse the other person is sinful. There are inevitably less clearly defined areas of sinful behaviour because it must involve the feelings and thoughts of the people involved, not just genital contact. Also there is the question of what is sexual temptation and what is lust? The Accuser often wants to confuse the two.

The clear Biblical teaching of TfT says that any sex with another person, outside the ‘one flesh’ male and female marriage relationship, is sin.

In terms of the possibility of two people, previously in a sexual relationship, continuing to live together without sex, this may be possible for some but not for others. It would be a similar situation for two heterosexual people. It is very easy to assume that sex is the only possible sin in a relationship. It should be recognised that envy, greed, idolatry and many other sins can be there in any relationship. In some they can be worked through in a way that means growth and wholeness as they know more of themselves and even more of God’s love. There will always be situations, where the battle with overcoming sin is so great that breaking off the relationship has to happen.

Scripture is silent on Civil Partnerships (CPs). They are a legal means whereby the Government grants certain legal provisions to those involved. The Government is free to grant whatever rights it wishes to its citizens and TfT has no wish to deny those rights. The key problem is one of perception that whilst CPs are technically not marriage, certainly not as it is biblically defined, they are seen by many as equivalent to marriage. TfT’s position is to uphold biblical marriage.

Unlike marriage, CPs do not legally seem to mention a sexual component. This means you cannot dissolve a CP on the grounds of it not being consummated. They were initially designed to be legally different from marriage in that respect. The problem, as mentioned earlier, is they may not be defined legally as a sexual relationship but most people would assume they are sexual. The question here therefore is the impression/message being in a civil partnership gives about the nature of a relationship. Also a civil partnership would have to be dissolved if either partner wants get married to someone of the opposite sex. Andrew Goddard’s Grove booklet on this is very helpful. Scripture gives clear examples of two people of the same sex making a covenant with each other before God. Some may argue that initially CPs could have given a legal framework for this. However, nowadays most people see it as an equivalent to marriage, which is unacceptable for Christians.

We need to appreciate that most non Christians will believe our biblical stance on this issue is ‘immoral’ because it appears to deny people love and happiness. Most people don’t think casual sex is healthy, but that monogamous relationships offer joy and fulfilment.

Therefore we need to be honest about the cost of being a Christian as well as the joy and peace through a relationship with our Creator. We need to question and often challenge if the actions of many Christian campaigners is what Jesus would do.

We need to look more positively at singleness and relationships, rather than conforming to a world that says, “You need a sexual relationship in order to be happy and fulfilled.” The church is often giving the same message but replacing ‘sexual relationship’ with ‘marriage’.

Sexuality development is a complex process, different for each person and involving several factors, including possibly some genetic predispositions. Being born or not born with attractions does not determine the right to act on them.

The Bible is silent about homosexual orientation, and there are only a handful of biblical references which clearly prohibit homosexual practice. Sadly the church and many Christians have tended to elevate homosexual practise into an imaginary 'premier league' of sins, whereas the Bible simply speaks of it as just one expression amongst many of our fallen, sinful human nature. The emphasis throughout the Bible is on ruling out any and all sexual practice which takes place outside of an exclusive heterosexual marriage between one man and one woman.

The key biblical reference is Genesis 2:24, which speaks of heterosexual marriage as being a re-uniting of man and woman in a 'one-flesh' emotional and sexual relationship; this verse is reinforced by Jesus and the Apostle Paul in the New Testament (e.g. Matthew 19:5-6 and Ephesians 5:31-32). Jesus is shown in the gospels as reaching out in mercy and compassion to those who have strayed sexually from God's ways, and gently urging them to repentance (e.g. John 4 and John 8).

We're living in a fallen world, and every one of us is born into this world with an imperfect sinful nature. Whilst it's true that God has 'knit me together in my mother's womb' (Psalm 139:13), the Psalmist also makes it clear that 'surely I was sinful at birth, sinful from the time my mother conceived me' (Psalm 51:5). An inevitable consequence of living in a fallen world with a sinful nature is that we will all desire and long for things, which are clearly prohibited by God in the Bible. Some people will struggle with anger, others with envy, still others with hatred, bitterness, jealousy, slander, or a desire to steal, or commit adultery, or to rebel against their parents. Most people will struggle to one degree or another with lust; for the majority it will be lust over people of the opposite sex, but for some it will be lust over people of the same sex - the Bible simply calls it lust.

The gospel of Jesus Christ redeems (rescues) us from the power and consequences of our sinful natures and begins to transform us, so that increasingly, step by step, we desire and are empowered to live lives which conform to God's pattern for living in the Bible. It's worth noting that very often 'gay feelings' are actually masking a legitimate, unfulfilled need for a right kind of same-sex intimacy, affection, affirmation and acceptance.

Living as a Christian with homosexual desires is not easy, but the testimony of many within TfT is that is certainly possible and amazingly can have real rewards in terms of spiritual and character growth. Sexual feelings are often really expressing a desire for love that goes deeper than the sexual attractions. However, God has created us ‘not to be alone’ and therefore we each need to work how He can help us to meet this need through Godly relationships, based on our value as God's children.

Nowhere in the bible is there a promise of a temptation free life. Jesus challenges His followers to take up their crosses and die daily and Romans Ch8 v12-13 challenge us to continue to live from the Spirit of God rather than our sinful nature. Struggles of one sort or another are most likely therefore to remain a “thorn in the flesh” to us. As we yield to Christ and learn to overcome, they could well diminish, and we can never rule out a sovereign act of God. In this world, however, freedoms generally need fighting for and an important lesson from Judges Ch3 v2 is to learn battle experience: it makes us stronger.

“All things are possible”, but perhaps it is better to ask “How likely is it?”, and even perhaps “How necessary is it?” Many gay people desire to be straight, but is just being straight, a godly goal? For the Christian exchanging one set of sexual temptations for another set, is not really much progress in terms of living a life that gives glory to God. We must at least look beyond the world’s view of sexuality and ask what does God require of me? Perhaps too easily we assume God requires heterosexuality – but scripture puts it differently and talks about faithfulness to God in restraining sexual behaviour outside of marriage. All of us are asked to behave within sexual boundaries. The bible does not seem to mention orientation or attractions.

If marriage is not in God’s plan for us, does sexual orientation matter too much? And if marriage is in God’s plan for us, there are many within TfT who can testify that He is able to create a faithful and loving covenant commitment including the sexual element for us towards our spouse, without the need for a general sexual attraction to the opposite sex. Our real need is to be attracted to the one person, not to the many. Perhaps this question challenges the modern assumptions about the labels we attach to our sexuality and asks us to focus less on what we perceive our needs to be and more on the true essentials of living a holy life. It is certainly possibly to live in a happy and fulfilling marriage and yet continue to battle with same sex attraction. Heterosexuality is not a pre-requisite to marriage.

In some cultures, there have been times when homosexual activity has been seen as fashionable or convenient. However, for the vast majority of people attracted to others of the same sex, these attractions are not a choice. The attractions often bring a burden of shame for the individual and opposition/prejudice from others.

The causes of homosexuality in women are similar to the causes for men, although some women struggle more with emotional dependency than erotic desires.

The causes of homosexuality in men are similar to the causes for women, although generally men struggle more with erotic desires than emotional dependency.