In this interview, we sat down with Dr David Pullinger; a leading researcher in singleness and religion and a Director of Single Friendly Church, which is a UK-based organisation that launched in 2014 to promote biblical emphasis on valuing singleness within the church. David told us about their work and vision.
In June 2019, I circulated a pair of surveys about singleness in the UK church – one survey for single people and one for married people. The purpose was to collect some perceptions of singleness from a range of people – male and female; single and married; young and old.
The topic of masturbation is rarely addressed by churches and so Christians can find themselves conflicted by feelings of shame, confusion and self-justification on this common struggle. Gary explores out what the Bible says about masturbation and proposes some practical wisdom to escape from the cycle of shame, frustration and failure.
In those moments where we singles may be struggling, probably the last words we want to hear are, “God has just called you to be single, right now”. Something about this isn’t very reassuring, especially if we lack any sense of calling to singleness. Don’t worry - this kind of plainly apparent calling isn’t the experience of most.
Receiving a gift should stir feelings of great gratitude. But if we were to play a word association game with ‘singleness’, how many of us would associate it with joy, thankfulness and other positive emotions? There have certainly been times I’ve failed to treat this gift as something good, provided by our loving heavenly Father.
In “7 Myths about Singleness”, Sam Allberry turns the tables on a subject that has been taboo for too long. Reading this book, I felt empowered knowing I am not alone. Jesus has already walked the path I have. I was reminded that the gospel is good news for everyone, whether you are single or married.
It’s worth reminding ourselves that every human being experiences singleness. Some will marry, and half of them then experience singleness again when their spouse dies. So, while the issue may have a particular resonance for those with SSA, it is relevant to everyone – not least single Christians.
Pornography, masturbation, sexual fantasy, lustful thoughts... They’re just men’s issues, aren’t they? The ways in which women struggle may often be subtly different to our male counterparts, but the fundamental issues of our sinful hearts seeking fulfilment in the wrong places are just the same.
David Bennett was attracted to other boys from the age of 14, and so had issues with Christianity because he felt if he was to become a Christian he couldn’t act on his romantic inclinations. He became a gay activist in Australia in support of gay marriage. But, “Jesus did not stay tidily out of [his] life.”