Being a minority voice on same-sex marriage can be very painful. A number of my colleagues have chosen to adopt a position which, in my view, goes against God's word. It comes with a bit of sadness that a denomination which I love, which I've grown up in, which does so much good in the world, would adopt a position which is at odds with God's ordering of our lives and God's design for his people.

I had recently asked my Barnabas group for advice about how to develop friendships with other women in light of same-sex attraction. So, when my group leader asked me to read and review “No Greater Love”, I eagerly agreed, hopeful to gain some clear insights, as well as a deeper theological understanding of friendship. I was not disappointed.

Friendship is a precious relationship. Over the years I have been very grateful for many friends with whom I have shared the up and downs of our lives. I am particularly thankful for those friends with whom I have grown close enough to be able to share my life-journey with same-sex attraction. When I was an undergraduate, the first fellow student I shared that with became a lifelong friend, though we now live hundreds of miles apart.

This new resource from the Evangelical Alliance looks at the importance of having, and being, good friends. It comprises 5 videos of about 10 minutes each, all presented by Phil Knox, who has written a book on the topic. There is also a free downloadable small group resource.

The 5 sessions look at such topics as the biblical basis for friendship, the pressures on friendships today, having close friendships and, finally, the importance of friendship with God.

I have a plaque in my kitchen given by a friend with the quote: “Friendship is like sunshine, it keeps us warm and helps us grow.” Certainly, friendship has been described as many things, from a garden of flowers, to chocolates, to a ship believe it or not! (“There are big ships and small ships but the best ship of them all is friendship” - Anon.)

As someone who neglects reading books, I am so glad that I have read this one. I believe it will be a game-changer in my friendships.

John Wyatt starts with a brief history of friendship and shows us what has happened to it in our generation. We look at the examples of friendship in the Bible and how friendship is lauded in the Book of Proverbs. Clearly, it is an issue that is important to God; amazingly, he invites us to be friends with Him!

Jesus didn’t say ‘Go and make friends’, but ‘Go and make disciples’. Both are not mutually exclusive, and both should be part of the lives of those who follow Jesus. Yet it is making disciples that is the more pressing commission given to us by Jesus Christ. As you make disciples, you cannot help but make friends too. Many years ago, I was a volunteer staff member at a Baptist Church in the north-east of England.

During my Curate training, the higher-ups thought it would be a good idea to make me (I use that word deliberately) do a placement in a school. To be fair, it was indeed a good idea. The thinking is that it helps Assistant Curates (assistant ministers) understand the inner workings of Church of England schools. When I wasn’t accidentally giving the wrong answers to Key Stage Two maths questions (that was humbling!), I was observing just how easy it was for the children to make friends. No drama. No angst. Friendship was just so natural for them.
 

TFT: What it was like for you growing up, Malcolm?