Review "Leading a Church in a Time of Sexual Questioning" by Bruce B. Miller

On the back cover of “Leading a Church in a Time of Sexual Questioning”, the claim is that this book offers “…biblical guidance for ministering God’s love in a sexually diverse culture.” The words “God’s love” are circled in red, emphasising that central theme.Compassion drives this book. Miller shows great care and concern, and urges his readers to exhibit those same qualities, for the queer teenagers who are being raised in a Christian home, the gay man who has walked away from his Christian faith and the lesbian couple who have never even been in a church. He exhorts this posture of compassion through sharing relevant statistics, data and personal stories of the sometime distressing scenarios faced by LGBTQ+ people. Above all, his obvious declaration of the gospel and the Lordship of Jesus Christ is foundational in demonstrating the grace of God. 

Love moves the book on, but Miller is never judgemental of those who wrestle with following the call to show the same concern for the struggler that he espouses and reaches out to them. He empathises, both with the reader who grew up in a culturally conservative world, and the pastor who will have difficulties ministering in a similar milieu. He challenges those people to take a more Christ-centered posture of compassion, but never stands above them wagging a finger. 

Its two great strengths are these: it makes love central and it covers a wide range of topics. There is a biblical overview of the purpose of sex and the issues surrounding same-sex sexuality. It delves into tricky questions of identity, attractions and orientation. Miller takes us to Jesus as his example of how we should welcome all people; how do we engage with sexual sinners, whilst not affirming a sinful relationship? He offers wisdom on leading people who are hostile to LGBT+ individuals, as well as guidance on helping LGBTQ+ people live holy lives. There is an overview of the current debate on covenantal friendship. In the last few chapters, this practical book takes it up a gear by offering a liturgy of healing for those who are sexual sinners, with advice on issues surrounding church membership, baptism, marriage and many other topics. 

I think this is a good book and I’m glad I’ve read it, but I have two critiques. Firstly, is it too broad? The book covers so many topics and it does so very quickly. Sometimes I think this works well - the discussion on orientation was incredibly stimulating and made me want to read more, but I think Miller made his point and I’m glad we moved on. At other times, it felt like we shift from issue to issue without properly discussing each one. He has a section on how we should deal with those who hold a different viewpoint on marriage to us. It is not a bad section, but it is just too brief. The argument is complicated and needs to be fleshed out for it to be of any use. A pastor friend of mine is also reading this book. He found the discussion on church membership to be so simple that it didn’t aid him in the difficult decisions he needs to make. 

My second critique is something I felt while reading the book, but my pastor friend didn’t. I didn’t think Bruce Miller was saying anything new. One thing I liked about the book was the number of sources he used; he quotes from theologians and same-sex attracted Christians. But this meant that I was often reading ideas I had already read before from the original sources. However, being a same-sex attracted Christian worker, I’ve now read a fair few books on sexuality, marriage and the Christian, so maybe because of my own broad input, I’m being unfair. My reading buddy (heterosexual) pastor friend hasn’t read as much, and he really appreciated the wide perspective that was offered. 

To conclude, I’m glad Miller has written this book. It is undergirded with God’s love and his sincere intention is to equip Christian ministers to widen their outlook and overcome the potential obstacles they encounter in understanding and reaching those who struggle with same-sex attraction. It wouldn’t be recommended reading if you’ve already comprehensively read round this topic. But, I would definitely read it, if you want a really good introduction to some complicated questions.  
 

This article was originally published in the Spring 2023 edition of the TFT magazine, Ascend. Click the button below to download your copy.