How my singleness declares the gospel

Marriage reflects the gospel by representing Christ’s love for the church. This is a glorious truth I have heard proclaimed at countless weddings and whenever marriage is spoken of from the pulpit or in Bible study. Yet on the other hand, when singleness is brought up, the only positive thing you hear about it is that those who are single can be undivided in their service to God. This, too, is a biblical perspective (1 Corinthians 7) that rightly should be taught, but the overarching message that tends to be communicated in the church is that those who are married have, entwined in their identity, an innate reflection of Gospel truth, while those who are single have the outward practical benefit of having more time. 

Reflecting Gospel truths

Looking beyond 1 Corinthians 7, a biblical theology of singleness not only speaks to the undivided attention that singles can give to the things of God, but it becomes clear that healthy singleness also points to something greater, innately reflecting Gospel truths. Peter Scazzero, in his book “The Emotionally Healthy Leader”, goes further in saying that if you are single, “singleness is your loudest gospel message.” He describes this saying that, “as a single leader, you bear witness to the sufficiency and fullness of Jesus through your celibacy” and “you bear witness to the reality of the resurrection in a unique way.” Let’s consider each of these more fully below. 
The sufficiency and fullness of Jesus is reflected in those who remain celibate because, rather than giving their bodies away and fulfilling sexual pleasure, they instead find satisfaction in Christ. In other words, celibate Christians show that a relationship with Jesus is enough for a fulfilled life. I am part of a TFT Barnabas group, a support group that has been reading the book “Jesus, Lover of My Soul” by Julian Hardyman, who was also a speaker at a recent TFT conference. What has stood out to me is the intimacy that we enjoy with Christ. He calls me beloved. 

Christ and the Church

Believers who are single will be part of a marriage, that which is between Christ and the church. Jesus calls himself the bridegroom (Matthew 9:15; John 3:29) and the kingdom of heaven is described like a wedding banquet (Matthew 25:1). In Revelation 19 we see that “…the wedding of the Lamb has come, and his bride has made herself ready.” This is the ultimate marriage to which earthly marriages serve as a signpost. Singleness says that the real thing, the union with Christ, is so much better and more important than just the sign. 

Singleness also bears witness to the resurrection by focusing on what is eternal rather than what is temporary. In the Old Testament, marriage and procreation were the primary means through which God grew His covenant people. The first command God gave to mankind was, “Be fruitful and multiply” (Genesis 1:28). Through Abraham, Isaac, Jacob and so on, the covenant promise was carried through physical offspring. In his book, “A Biblical Theology of Singleness”, Barry Danylak continues to trace this important connection between offspring and covenantal blessing throughout the Old Testament. 

This is the culture into which Isaiah wrote, “For thus says the Lord: to the eunuchs who keep my Sabbaths, who choose the things that please me and hold fast my covenant, I will give in my house and within my walls a monument and a name better than sons and daughters; I will give them an everlasting name that shall not be cut off.” (Isaiah 56:4-5). In this new perspective that the prophets are looking towards, there is something better than sons and daughters here on earth. Those who keep the covenant get a name that is everlasting. That was a radical perspective in a culture where blessing was dependent on offspring. 

Future reality 

Isaiah 53 looks towards the Messiah and His death that will bring salvation. We know this to be pointing to the work of Christ on the cross. In this context of salvation, Isaiah says, "He shall see his offspring" (Isaiah 53:10). The idea of offspring continues to be turned counterculturally in the New Covenant. Isaiah 53, in the context of the atonement at the coming Messiah’s death, says that he shall see his offspring (Is. 53:10). 

Galatians 3:7 and 26 describe being sons of Abraham and sons of God by faith. Jesus, during His time of earthly ministry, also redefines familial relationships (Matthew 12:46-48). So, it is spiritual regeneration and faith in the atoning work of Christ that creates the new covenant people and family. It is this family, the church, that is eternal. John Piper describes church family saying, “relationships in Christ are more permanent and more precious than relationships in families.” 

That is good news. A few years ago, I stood at my grandfather’s grave in the days following his funeral. I reflected on my family heritage, yet I grieved that I was watching our family line begin to die out, as neither my cousin, my sister or I seem likely to have children. By remaining steadfast in my singleness, I am saying that I trust the promises that the future reality will be even better. By investing in my spiritual children, those with whom I am teaching and leading in the ways of Christ, and finding deep and meaningful relationships with my brothers and sisters in Christ, I am reflecting the importance of spiritual family and the eternality of the church. Of course, having children in your earthly family is a great blessing, and there is nothing wrong with that desire, but for anyone, married or single, to whom God has not given children, there is an opportunity to show that what is eternal is more important than what is temporary. 

Satisfaction in Christ

For those of us who are single, if singleness is our loudest gospel message, we have a responsibility to steward our singleness well. This starts with our own relationship with Christ. As we grow in our love of Christ and His Word, He will strengthen our faith which allows us to be fully satisfied in Him. As these truths shape the way we see ourselves and our singleness, they begin to flow out of that singleness to be evident to those around us. 

Sam Allberry summarizes these ideas saying, “Marriage shows us the shape of the gospel in that it models the covenant promises that God has made to us in Christ. Singleness shows us the sufficiency of the gospel because it shows us the reality of what marriage points to—which is our own relationship with Jesus.” May those of us who are single pursue and embrace healthy singleness, knowing that in doing so, we shine forth these Gospel truths. 
 

This article was originally published in the Spring 2023 edition of the TFT magazine, Ascend. Click the button below to download your copy.