Happiness begins and ends in Jesus Christ. That’s it. Full stop. Surely it can’t be as simple as that? We all have friends and family who will encourage us to think something quite different. The argument is often that happiness can only truly be found in the arms of another person, in a sexual union of some sort. We hear voices saying that having Jesus is all well and good, but in this life, you can’t just rely on Him. You need something or someone else that is more tangible and immediate.
The Naked Truth Project, nakedtruthproject.com, is a UK charity “committed to changing minds and changing lives through awareness, education and recovery programmes.” The website opens with a video of a powerful poem; this beautifully depicts their goal to teach about the harmfulness of porn and provide a vision for life, human flourishing and restoration. Toward that end, they offer a variety of resources to help parents, spouses, teachers, schools and churches understand and address issues of pornography.
I have been battling with porn for most of my life. My first encounter with hard core porn came between the ages of 11 and 12. I never thought at the time how much this would destroy me. Years passed and I would regularly watch videos or look at magazine images. At the age of 18, I made a commitment of faith, but, sadly, not very much changed in my behaviour. A week before my 21st birthday, my life with Jesus took a big step forward. I began getting help with my alcohol dependency, but my issue with porn remained unaddressed.
One morning, while still in bed, I had a big light bulb moment. I suddenly realised that I had got myself into a big hole. I was drowning, and I wasn’t really sure how I got there. I had become addicted to pornography.
In this conversation, Ruth talks with Ros Clarke about how she uses art and craft to consider matters of sexuality, celibacy and singleness. She explores how art has been a way of bringing a message of biblical truth about sexuality to the church.
This August I will be having a ceremony to dedicate myself to a life of singleness. A ceremony like this is not a common thing. I’ve heard of one or two people who have done something similar, most notably Kate Wharton, who was on the leadership team of New Wine for some years.
As a woman with same-sex attraction, I have a history of running away from God and suppressing the conviction of adhering to biblical holiness that He graciously placed on my heart. In my country, same-sex attractions are neither generally spoken about, nor properly addressed in churches,. Therefore, it’s quite easy to not only to compromise belief, but to avoid accountability for ungodly living and keep under the radar.
When looking at this question, “is the Bible positive about singleness?”, it’s easy for us to jump straight to the Apostle Paul’s verdict, “I wish that all men were [unmarried] as I am”– 1 Cor 7:7. But how do we reconcile this with the consistent emphasis on marriage and filling the land throughout the Old Testament? This seems to be one of God’s priorities from the start, beginning with God’s command to Adam and Eve to “be fruitful and multiply” – Gen 1:28.
“I want to talk about sex and relationships” said Dr Helen Roseveare as we interviewed her at the Keswick Convention as part of the 19-24s stream back in 2011. She continued. “Being single is a gift from God and we can use it to serve Him. We don’t need to go chasing a life of romance and sex”. I found that deeply challenging in a world that was telling me otherwise. I’ll come back to Dr Roseveare.