I was about 15 years old when I realised I was gay. Though I grew up in the church – my dad was a vicar – it wasn’t a topic I ever remember being addressed. My only frame of reference for what Christians thought about homosexuality was a quick mention in a Religious Studies class, where it was stated that Catholics were against gay sex, but that Protestants thought it was probably OK! Goodness knows how that summary had been arrived at, but I took it as gospel. Fine, I thought. I’m not ready to come out yet. This was the early 2000s and I didn’t know any gay people in my rural community.

I was born on January 12th 1948 into a family of Anglican church goers who sent away their male offspring to boarding school as a matter of course. I have to say all nine years from the age of eight were traumatic for me. The second school, one of the top public schools, was supposed to be established for the sons of Anglican clergy. It was there I first encountered homosexuality.

When I was asked to give this testimony, and told that the theme was about accountability, I was instantly a bit nervous. As I was trying to work out what to say for this, I kept finding myself trying to avoid one particular aspect of my story. But I really felt God put it on my heart to write about. So, just to rip the bandage off right away, this testimony is about my struggle with pornography. I have been in recovery from a porn addiction for the last 4 years or so.

This article explains why Capernwray Bible School is planning to extend and deepen its curriculum regarding what the Bible teaches about gender and sexuality for its students.

I was brought up by two loving Christian parents. They both worked in full time Christian ministry, so I spent much of my childhood in or around church.

Is the risk worth it?
I hope this article encourages those who have been hurt in past friendships and relationships, to stay in community with others. I suggest that committing is worth it, as we take the risk of being open and vulnerable with others.

Emotional dependency occurs when your emotional well-being becomes overly dependent on another person. Your emotions fluctuate from extreme highs to extreme lows depending on how they treat you or how you perceive them treating you. Emotional dependency expects more from a person than that person can give. It is not a unique experience for same-sex attracted individuals. Anyone can become emotionally dependent on another person.

In the spring of 2020, as a middle-aged single man living alone in London, I was invited by a young family in my church to "bubble” with them for the foreseeable future, while Covid restrictions began to be implemented.
Throughout the various lockdowns, I spent all day every Sunday with them and one evening midweek too. I’d been feeling emotionally low for the previous year, so I don’t think I’m being overly dramatic if I say that it probably saved my life.
A little over a year ago, they came back from a holiday in Australia with a clear sense that God was calling them to help plant a church in Sydney.

When I picked up this short booklet, my interest was piqued. However, I was also somewhat sceptical of how the subject of polyamory or consensual non-monogamy (where “all parties agree that the relationship is not exclusive”) might impact me, my church and the ministry of TFT. By the time I’d finished reading the booklet, it had certainly made me sit up and take note.